We are nine months into 2020 and this rollercoaster of a year is almost over. Count them with me: THREE more months people! Remember New Year’s Day and how we felt going into this new decade? Bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, we were ready to start fresh and see what the next ten years would bring. Now close your eyes and take a moment to reflect on that feeling. Are there things you haven’t accomplished yet? Goals you haven’t reached? Places you didn’t get to go? Things you didn’t get to do? The list goes on and on, and you know what? It’s okay to be pissed off, sad, disappointed or whatever type of way you are feeling about this crapbag of a year we were handed. So, let’s start focusing on moving forward.

I’m here to tell you that whatever you are feeling is valid. It’s totally fine to mourn the losses we have suffered this year because it’s been really tough. Some of us fell on hard times, some lost relationships, some found out what their natural hair color actually looks like. Whether it be something big like canceling that trip you saved up so much money for, or those little self care rituals like getting your nails done. We have all lost something this year but I think we have also gained a lot.

It’s important to recognize that we’ve grown a lot in these last 7 months or so. Maybe we’ve started to be a little more independent, or leaned into family and friends in ways we never had to before. Perhaps we learned some things about ourselves, or took time to reflect and appreciate some of the things we take for granted. In a way, good comes out of every storm even if it’s just brining people together.

I’m also here to remind you that you need to give yourself, and those around you, some grace. Absolutely no one is perfect and this rollercoaster year didn’t exactly come with a road map, or even a seatbelt. Times like this can bring us down but in the same breath they give us life. You can’t grow when you are comfortable; you can’t move forward if you’re standing still. While the future may be uncertain, all we can do is live in this moment and decide how we are going to show up. No matter what, we need to continue to show up.

Yes, we may have three more months of 2020 to endure but I am hopeful that the worst is behind us (barring the election if you live in the U.S. like me—but we aren’t going to talk about that because we are staying positive here). Hopefully something in this post resonated with you or at the very least made you feel like you’re not the only one if you’ve been struggling. Keep your head up, keep showing up, keep growing, keep living and be graceful with yourself while you do it.

<3 Ash